I am sure you are thinking, "Gee this is going to be a post on honesty, and how honesty is so important, and good, and how it can be used to strengthen a family!"
Wrong!
Sorry to disappoint, but this post is on communication.
Sound familiar? Communication issues are so funny to u TV watchers, because we can relate to them. Communication is hard.
First, we have to have an idea or feeling that we want to express. Then, we have to encode it into the message. Encoding is sort of like figuring out how we are going to say our idea/feeling. We have to choose the media in which we are going encode our message in (Speech, Facebook Message, text, even no 'communication' at all can be a media). Here is where we run into a bit of a problem. Sometimes, static can get in the way and make our message we are trying to get across, come out unclear. So when the person we are communicating with tries to decode our message, they might get confused! This person now has to decide what we are saying, and come up with an idea/feeling to communicate back. The whole process starts all over again!
What are the rules of communication? The most confusing thing is that, it is different with everyone. The rules in one family may be totally different than the rules in another. Heck, the rules differ from person to person. The trick is, is when you are decoding a message, it is important take your time. Think about what the other person is trying to say. It is truly okay to ask the other person what they mean before responding - especially when you are getting to know another person. My biggest advice? Take your time to learn others' rules of communication and give them time to learn yours, life will be a lot smoother!
I am going to go off on a bit of a tangent really quick. I love hearing stories other people tell me about how they had a spiritual experience and heard, or felt the presence of a loved one that has passed on in their life. (That sentence was weird... sorry!) Anyway, I thought that I would tell you one of those stories that I experienced just last year.
As many of you know, I have two brothers. Nick is 12 years older than me and Casey is 6 years older. Casey died six months after he was born of congenital heart defects. Around this time last year, I was starting to have a really hard time. I was going through some things that I didn't really want to talk to my roommates about. I remember I was once at a party of sorts. I was withdrawing myself from the group - and just feeling really alone. It was Casey's 25th birthday and I just thought, "Maybe I will reach out to him." I started thinking to my brother, I guess it was kind of a prayer. Two days later - on a Sunday night my lower back spazzed out. It really hurt - like I could barely walk. My roommate told me a couple of our guy friends were coming over to play games and she asked me if I wanted them to give me a priesthood blessing. Blessings are very sacred to me, and I don't like to ask for them unless I truly feel that I need them. If I were to ask for a blessing of health every time my back hurt, I would be getting blessings every day, and that diminishes the sacredness of them for me. This whole semester I had been fending off my roommates whenever my back hurt - because I knew that whatever pain I was feeling at the time I could handle it - and I would get a blessing when I couldn't handle it anymore. Anyway, she asked me if I wanted a blessing and I thought for a second and something told me I should get one. So, when our friends came over, they gave me a blessing for my back to heal. But then they moved on in their blessing.
The friend who was giving me this blessing, started to tell me everything I needed to hear regarding what I was going through emotionally. He knew nothing about it. Not even my roommates knew anything about it. But Casey did. I felt a spiritual surge run through my body, and I knew Casey was there. I knew that Casey was whispering into my friend's ear the exact words to say - the words that would bring me comfort during a personally hard time.I remember being able to control my tears at the time, but I make no promises when I retell it. That moment in time grew my testimony in so many amazing ways. My testimony grew regarding the priesthood, and I was so grateful that the young man who gave me my blessing was worthy enough to hear what Casey needed him to tell me. My testimony grew regarding veil that separates this world from the spiritual, and how thin it really is. Also, I truly knew that Heavenly Father listens to my heart, and my silent pleas for comfort.
I bet you are wondering, what does this have to do with communication? We need to communicate not only with the people around us, but with our Father in Heaven. He knows us better than we even know ourselves. He knows our hearts, and He sends the people who we love, and who love us, to us in our time of need. However, we have to be willing to accept the hands He reaches out to us. Talk to God. If you don't know what to say, just tell Him about your day. Believe me, once the words start flowing between you and Heavenly Father, they will be hard to stop.
Today is Casey's 26th birthday. A year ago today I was feeling alone, dark and sad. I am happy to say that my brother has told me when I need a blessing when I am being stubborn, and I know that he is always with the men who give them to me. Whether it is my Dad, friends or home teachers. I love my brothers, and even though Casey is gone, I know he will always be there for me to talk to.
Happy birthday big brother.
No comments:
Post a Comment